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Smoking – ugh!!!!

Do any members of your staff smoke? Have you ever wondered how much their committing suicide in instalments, is costing your firm? Have you ever considered how, by daily assailing their systems with one of the most lethal poisons known to man, your staff are not actually in the same condition as when you hired them? And if you believe in the old adage that ‘smoking stunts your growth’, have you considered they may be shorter in stature than when you first signed them up? You may be getting less and less staff for your money…
It is an interesting exercise to work out the cost of smokers to your company; which can easily be done on the back of a cigarette packet. If for instance one assumes that the average smoker has 1 cigarette an hour (conservative in the extreme), and works 8 hours a day, 22 days a month.
Then while at work they will smoke 176 cigarettes a month. If it takes about 5 minutes to smoke a cigarette, they are using 880 min = 14.6 hours or 1.8 days a month. If they do this for 12 months, (which inevitably if they are dedicated smokers they will), that equals 22 days. Astonishing isn’t it? A whole working month wasted on balconies and in car-parks, smoking. Take a month’s salary for any worker who smokes, and that is what he/she is costing you.
But even if you think 8 cigarettes a day is high; assume say, 5 a day, and the costs are still staggering. Here you are paying them the equivalent of 13.75 days – two weeks wages – to stand and smoke. Multiply that by the number of smokers in the company and the cost becomes breathtaking.
The physical consequences of smoking are slightly more subtle, in that they present through things like full blown sick leave for respiratory diseases, and general absenteeism because of the affects of constantly subjecting lungs to toxic filth.
Yet the act of smoking is in itself fascinating. As an ex-smoker I can attest to the fact that it actually is difficult to ‘learn’ to smoke. I coughed and spluttered my way through a couple of packets of cigarettes, before I could inhale without looking as though I was having an apoplectic fit. Weird to think that one has to work at acquiring such a vile, dirty, unhealthy, anti-social and expensive habit.
It was only years later, when I finally gave up smoking, I realised just how stupid people look when they smoke. Divorce yourself from the hype, the coolth and apparent mystique attached to smoking; then objectively watch someone put a burning roll of paper into their mouth, suck it and blow out clouds of smoke. Doesn’t it astonish you, just how silly they look?
Also, think of the bizarre behaviour that is synonymous with smoking. Take people who smoke after dinner. ‘I’ve just had a great meal so now I think I’ll stop conversing with you, pop outside, talk to strangers and do some damage to my lungs…’
Or after sex, ‘Was that good for you too darling? Now that we have just experienced the most exciting, spiritual, physical and intimate feeling that two people can share, I’ll lie back, give myself bad breath and stink up the room a little…’
I also find myself entranced by the irony of beautiful women putting on expensive and exotic perfumes, simply to swamp them with the flat, stale smell of burned tobacco.
Those are some of the problems with smoking; so what can be done about them? Well there are a number of commercial courses on offer to help smokers quit; all of which to a larger or a smaller extent, will be of benefit. However I don’t recommend substitutes like patches, gum or sprays; because ultimately they have to be given up.
But the easiest way to quit without spending money is to practise aversion therapy on the habit. All you need do every time a craving for a cigarette appears, is link it to something horrible; a sight, a smell, a fear, a pain or an illness.
Conversely, every time something horrible happens, think of craving a cigarette. So that ‘horrible’ and ‘craving’ become the same. You’ll be astonished when you study a pile of vomit, how quickly you lose interest in a cigarette. Or how unappealing the thought of a smoke becomes, when it is directly associated with the pain of smashing a finger with a hammer.
If you can force yourself to constantly exercise your imagination collecting revolting images and experiences, while persistently connecting them to the insidious craving for cigarettes; in just 21 days you will be an ex-smoker.
You won’t miss smoking and you also won’t crave horrible things. You will simply be what you were before you took up the habit; a non-smoker. No longer will you, your house or your car smell like an ashtray.
And your dull lifeless and smelly hair will regain its former glossy lustre. Your gums will return to a healthy pink. Your tongue will lose its kiss-repelling coating of yellow fur. Your teeth will gleam again and with clean teeth, will come fresh breath.
If you don’t think you had a bad-breath problem, get close to a smoker and discover what you unwittingly have been inflicting on your lovers, friends, and family.
Remember no-one has died from giving up smoking. So do it.